Mom’s New Colonel Boyfriend Yelled At Me. “In This House, I Give The Orders.” “I Am The Man Of The House.” I Turned Around In My Chair. I Was Holding My Admiral’s Stars. “Actually, Colonel… You Are Dismissed.” HE STOOD AT ATTENTION SHAKING.

Over dinner, he dominated the conversation. He talked about his years in the Air Force, the commands he’d held, the missions he’d overseen. When my mother tried to mention her volunteer work at the VA hospital, he smiled indulgently and pivoted back to a story about a NATO exercise in Germany.

I watched her face shift, the animation draining out, replaced by something patient and waiting.

He caught me observing and changed targets.

“You should bring someone home sometime, Samantha. Career is important, but you don’t want to wake up at fifty realizing you chose the wrong things.”

I’m forty-nine. I’ve led carrier strike groups, made decisions affecting thousands of sailors, briefed presidents. But in that moment, sitting at my mother’s table, I was being reduced to someone who’d made unfortunate life choices.

“I’m quite content with my path,” I said.

“Sure, sure. Just saying. Women today, they’re told they can have it all, but biology doesn’t negotiate.”

My mother’s laugh came out forced.

“Mark, Sam’s done wonderfully. I’m so proud of her.”

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