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“But it’s not like the books,” she said.
“She cries and I don’t know why. She won’t sleep. The apartment’s always a mess.
She lifted her head and looked straight at me.
“And I knew… if I brought her to you, I’d see it,” she said. “How easy it is for you. How natural.
You raised me without Mom. You worked two jobs and still read me stories and did my hair. I thought if I saw you with her, I’d realize how bad I am at this.”
My heart broke open.
“Gillian,” I said.
“Oh, honey. No.”
She shook her head, tears coming again.
“You were perfect,” she said. “I am nothing like that.”
“I was terrified every single day of your life,” I said.
She stared at me.
“No, you weren’t,” she said.
“You always knew what to do.”
I shook my head.
“Your mom was the natural,” I said. “When she died, I was sure I’d ruin you. I burned dinners.
Forgot stuff. Lost my temper when I shouldn’t have. I was scared and tired and guessing half the time.”
“But you stayed.”
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