When I Lost My Husband, I Didn’t Mention The Retirement Benefits He Left Me – Or The Second Home In Spain. A Week Later, My Son Sent Me A Message With Clear Instructions: “Start Packing, The House Has Been Sold.”

Lisa knows a contractor who could put in a kitchenet for you. Maybe a separate entrance. It would be perfect.

Your own little apartment.”

I unlocked the car but didn’t get in. “How thoughtful.”

“I know you’re probably worried about the cost, but Donald and I figured we could deduct it from the house sale proceeds. Think of it as an investment in your comfort.”

Your comfort, not my independence or my happiness.

My comfort like I was an elderly pet being relocated to more manageable quarters. “Darlene, when was the last time you called me just to see how I was doing?”

A pause. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, a phone call where you didn’t want something, where you asked about my day, my feelings, my plans, when you called because you missed talking to your mother.”

“Mom, that’s not fair.

I’ve been dealing with Kathleen’s college expenses, and you know how busy work has been.”

Kathleen’s college expenses. I leaned against my car, watching other people go about their normal Thursday afternoon errands. “Tell me about Kathleen’s expenses.”

“Well, tuition is 28,000 a year, plus room and board, books, her sorority fees.”

“Darlene, I’ve been sending Kathleen $500 every month since she started college for 2 years.

That’s $12,000.”

Silence. Money that was supposed to help with her expenses. Money you never mentioned to Donald when you discussed my supposed financial struggles.

“Mom, I”

Continue reading…